The String Bikini

Three high-school pals were walking on the boardwalk when they saw the most gorgeous girl in a string bikini. Two of the guys let out whistles and stared their eyes out, but Bubba, the third guy, took to his heels in the opposite direction.

A few days later all three were walking on the boardwalk again and saw the same girl, this time wearing nothing but the bikini bottom. And again, two of the guys went ape while Bubba ran for his life.

So when the guys saw the girl for the third time --- this time she's stark naked --- the other two guys grabbed Bubba before he could get away.

Shaking him by the shoulders, they shouted, "Why are you running away from a gorgeous sight like that, you jerk?"

Trembling, Bubba blurted out, "See, it's like this, my mom told me if I ever looked at a naked woman I'd turn into stone... and I felt something getting hard!"

                      

 

Ye-e-e-e-e-e-ha-a-a!

A young woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down. An American Indian on horseback soon came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would shout out a wild "Ye-e-e-e-e-ha-a-a-"so loud that it echoed off the surrounding hills.

When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, she expressed her thanks, and he yelled a final "Ye-e-e-e-e-ha-a-a!" and rode off.

"Why was that Indian so excited?" asked the service station attendant. "I don't know. I just rode behind him on the horse with my arms around his waist and holding onto the saddle horn so that I wouldn't fall off," the woman answered.

"Lady," the attendant said, "Indians don't use saddles."

The Rodeo Position

Two cowboys are out on the range talking about their favorite sex positions.

One says, "I think I enjoy the rodeo position the best."

"I don't think I have ever heard of that one," says the other cowboy. "What
is it?"

"Well, it's where you get your wife down on all fours and you mount her from behind. Then you reach around and cup each one of her breasts in your hands and whisper in her ear, 'Boy, these feel just like your sister's'. Then you try and stay on for eight seconds."