Tampax for Boys

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy, picked out a box of Tampax and proceeded to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asked the older boy, “Son, how old are you?”



“Eight,” the boy replied.



The man, perplexed but intrigued, couldn’t help but ask, “Do you know what these are used for?”



The boy replied, “Not exactly, but they aren’t for me. They’re for him (pointing to the boy who came in with him). He’s my little brother. He’s four. We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim and ride a bike. He can’t do either one.”

A Lesson on How to Live a Fuller Life

A philosophy professor stood before her class and had some items in front of her. When the class began, silently she picked up a large empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks. She then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. She shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. She then asked the students again if the jar was full. They again agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. Now, said the professor, I want you to recognize that this is your life. The rocks are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, your children - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical check-ups. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

But then... A student then took the jar which the other students and the professor agreed was full, and proceeded to pour in a glass of beer. Of course the beer filled the remaining spaces within the jar making the jar truly full. The moral of this tale is that no matter how full your life is, there is always room for BEER.

A Tall Coconut Tree

There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are four animals.....  A lion, A chimp, a giraffe, and a squirrel.




They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree. Who do you guess will win?  Your answer will reflect your personality. So think carefully . . . Try and answer within 30 seconds.




 Got your answer? Now scroll down to see the analysis.




If your answer is: lion = you're dull. Chimpanzee = you're dense.  Giraffe = you're a complete moron. Squirrel = you're hopeless.




A COCONUT TREE DOESN'T HAVE BANANAS.




Obviously you're stressed and overworked. You should take some time off and relax Have two glasses of wine. A full box of Chocolates. And a nice lunch. Now hurry up and forward it to someone else. They may need those glasses of wine.

TheCardiologist's Funeral

A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge Heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.

Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, 'I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral........I'm a gynecologist.'

The proctologist fainted.